{ amnesia }

the past is never forgotten—

mistakes, failures, tragedies

in particular,

never leave you.

you hide them away,

in the darkest corners of

regret, and

cement them there,

where they rot and

spoil the soil of

the heart, and

pollute the waters of the soul so that

nothing new can grow,

except the festering

corpses of dreams and aspirations.

you begin to see the past

as a lifelong affliction that

the mind must bear—

a kind of punishment.

no matter how deeply

you may yearn to change and

create,

the heart and soul have been

paved over, and

there are no cracks in

the cement.

you begin to see

all life as

punishment, and

the past as an immovable barrier—

you stop trying to change anything,

stop trying to create anything,

and stop trying to grow,

hoping to escape from the

painful memories that torment you by

recoiling from life entirely, and

retreating

into isolation, because

being alone is a good disguise, and

a good place to hide.

meanwhile,

the water level is rising and

you’re gasping for air.

if only

you could forget.

[ photo: photo by Lara Zankoul ]

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